Disclaimer: This letter isn't to one specific person. I had several people in mind when I wrote this, and some parts are written for specific people so I put it all together into one letter. A lot of things have happened in the past year of my life. Much of it I take full responsibility for. Other things, I don’t entirely understand. I’ve learned a lot. Most importantly, I learned how to heal. I healed from the damage that situations have caused me…the heartache I constantly felt. Losing a friend, a partner in crime, a confidant, felt like losing a part of myself. I had to come to terms with the fact that there were no more laughs, inside jokes, rapping together in the car, food runs and study dates. All those endearing memories were replaced with, subtweets, fights, dirty looks and finally, just no acknowledgement of each other’s existence. But through this, I learned how to be wrong, how to accept when I’m wrong, and how to move on. I learned how to forgive. Holding a grudge is too hard for me. I learned how to acknowledge my flaws and the value in doing so. I learned the value in me, and how to truly love myself. There was a time when I hoped for reconciliation. I hoped and prayed for it everyday. But I no longer want that. I’ve taken the time to learn myself and learn the things I want, and don’t want, out of this lifetime. I have realized that reconciliation is no benefit to either of us. This decision isn’t coming from a place of bad feelings or malice, in fact, it comes from a place of love — self-love. I realized that I am a better and stronger person being on my own. I want to let you know that I forgive you. We have fought, we have cried, we may haven even ruined the bond we had, but I forgive you. I’m done holding grudges towards you. The stupid fights and petty digs at each other, may have felt like a necessary way to release how we felt at the time, but it’s in the past now. I’ve healed on my own. You may have hurt me, but I have hurt you too. It no longer matters who was right or who was wrong but I do regret some decisions, and I would like to say that I am sorry. I am sorry for anything I did to hurt you and hurt our friendship. But that’s life. Nothing is promised and no one owes you anything. And even though we’re not in each other’s lives anymore, I still want to thank you. Thank you for being a friend to me — and dealing with everything that comes with that. Thank you for the years, or months, of love, laughter and care that you did give to me. Thank you even more for being a source of motivation because if you hadn’t chosen to react to me in the way that you did, then I might never have been inspired to make the life-changing decisions that I did. I am happier now than I have ever been. It took losing what we had for me to be awakened to what this life has to offer me and I am grateful for that. With all that being said, I wish you well. I hope that life gives you all that you have ever desired, and that you end each day as happy with where life has taken you as I am. Thank you for being the person you are and the friend I needed during that part of my life. Sincerely, KW
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